


Crystal Gets Drunk

by Vex_ation



Category: Pocket Monsters SPECIAL | Pokemon Adventures
Genre: Don't Try This At Home, Drinking, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-10-03
Packaged: 2020-11-22 20:31:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20880248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vex_ation/pseuds/Vex_ation
Summary: ~Des cristaux et Veuve Clicquot~Crystal is a nervous drinker. She happens to attend a stressful, high-class banquet with an open bar. Professor Oak's insurance deductible grew three sizes that night.





	Crystal Gets Drunk

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the specord formal writing event  
Please drink responsibly

On the night of June 17th, the moon was full and the stars twinkled overhead like pinpricks of light in the ebony blanket of sky. Their radiance was the backdrop to the Researcher's Summit in the crater of Sootopolis, where the world’s most brilliant minds gathered in their Sunday best to celebrate at a lavish venue with fellow aristocrats and professors. This was a night where reputations could be created or destroyed, a night that made a professor, a professor, more than an arboreal surname ever could. 

Crystal was understandably nervous. Here she was, in a Ruby-certified ballgown glittering with gems and blue silk, walking down a satin carpet and flanked by Professor Oak himself. He walked ahead with a lot of poise for someone his age, and like the rest of the professors, he radiated tact. Even Professor Elm, normally scatterbrained and forgetful, walked alongside his wife like a man who had never laid eyes on the unworthy or walked in the footsteps of a commoner. It gave Crystal the jitters. 

As they sat down, she looked around at the other professors-- mostly sitting with their regional assistants and friends-- when she began to feel out of place. Oak gave her a warm smile. Even still, the pressure was there, and Crystal hadn’t realized how tense she looked until Green put a hand on her shoulder. 

“Don’t feel pressured, your reputation precedes you. You will always be the one who completed the pokedex, and you’ll always be a capture pro,” he explained. “You’ve already made the professor proud, so just relax and enjoy. That’s what we’re all here for after all.”  
“Drinks are free,” Oak chimed in as he stood up and walked over with Daisy to the bar. A waiter placed a flute of champagne in front of Crystal as Green sat down across from her. She brought it to her lips, savoring the taste and feeling more like a socialite by the minute. Something about the bitter taste and bubbles on her tongue helped calm her nerves. But soon the flute was empty-- Crystal didn’t remember there being so little in each glass-- and the waiter placed another in front of her. Crystal looked up in surprise, but the waiter just smiled and waved her on. 

“I cannot fault a girl for having good taste,” he said with a wink before walking off to another table. Crystal smiled and treated herself to another glass.  
As Green and Crystal both found out that day, Crystal drank when she got nervous. That night, Crystal was very nervous.  


As the night went on and courses came and went, the DJ in the back booth began to change his tune, playing music with a little more of a groove. The kind of music that made you want to sway and shake. The kind of music that made you want to dance along.  
The energy was infectious, worming its way into Crystal’s body like a Joltik. It squirmed beneath her skin, tickling her fingertips, her head, her spine, her legs; it traveled downwards without stopping, spreading like wildfire. Beneath the table, Crystal began to tap her foot, marking the beginning of the end.  


It happened around the seventh glass of champagne. Crystal stood up suddenly, pushing her chair back as she stared ahead in glassy-eyed determination. Green could see past the brilliant pink flush on her cheeks and knew that this was her capture face, which could only mean one thing: trouble. Eyes locked on her prize, she stumbled towards the dance floor, swaying from what may have been the rhythm of the music and what may have been alcohol poisoning but what was most certainly a bad idea. She took long strides to the center of the gently pulsing lights, locking eyes with the DJ and causing the few awkward dancers to look even more awkward as they stared at her in confusion.  


They parted for her, watching as Crystal’s swaying became a rhythmic stepping and then something that may have at one point resembled dancing. Scores of judgemental professors and assistants stared her down as the music rumbled louder and Crystal fell into the groove. As bouncier music began to pulse out the speakers, Crystal began to really, truly dance.  


Green watched in wide eyed horror as Crystal ripped the dance floor to shreds. The professors and assistants murmured to each other, their whispers floating through the room like ghosts of shame.  


"Who is that girl?"  


"I've never seen dance moves like that!"  


"I had no idea you could do a split in a ballgown, I'm impressed."  


"Is she... krumping?"  


This would be a long night.  


Green’s internal anxiety began to grow, fluttering like a nest of startled Venomoth in his chest. Crystal was there, alone and exposed, dancing her heart out as a group of judgmental old men stared at her from all sides like a flock of wrinkly, socialite vultures. It was unbearable, and Green was not content to let her embarrass herself like this.  


Not alone.  


Crystal twirled around the dancefloor, swaying like a Spinda with tottering steps. There was a certain elegance to her movements and the way that each twist and shake of her body flowed with the music. She lifted her arm, taking hold of an imaginary partner and turning round so that the hem of her dress caught the breeze and fanned out. The gems sewn into the fabric caught the twinkling light of the chandelier and a handsome savior caught her hands. His fingers carefully intertwined with her own as he leaned into her dance, dipping her as she fell backwards into his arm.  


Crystal could see the rest of the hall-- now upside down-- and caught sight of two girls sitting together at a table. One of them watched her, starstruck, while the other’s lip curled in mute horror. But then Green pulled Crystal out of the dip and pulled her close. The scent of expensive champagne on her breath lingered in the air, mixing with his cologne. He pulled her in, close enough so that their faces nearly touched. His voice was music to her intoxicated ears.  


“You owe me for this.”  


Despite the inappropriateness of the situation, Green had to admit that Crystal was actually quite good at dancing. Thankfully, so was he. He joined her in step, leading her around as the lights sparkled in her ice-blue eyes and the music rose in harmony with the sound of her drunken laughter.  


As they moved around the dance floor, the entire room seemed to fall silent. There was something captivating about the two dexholders’ moves. It was elegant, rhythmic, and enchanting. The synergy between the unlikely pair surprised even Professor Oak, who marveled at how his grandson and his assistant could look so incredible while dancing to, of all things, a KE$HA song. As he looked around, he saw his colleagues begin to nod their heads and tap their feet.  


One of the assistants in particular-- Rowan’s helper, if he remembered correctly-- seemed eager to leap up and join the two on the floor but was being held back by a friend. Green was shocked Crystal had done this, he was shocked he was doing this, but he was more shocked when people started joining in.Birch’s daughter pulled him onto the floor, encouraging him to let loose and have fun while she hopped around him like a Buneary. Elm and his wife joined them, and soon Juniper and Kukui and Rowan and Sycamore and-- good Giratina was that Magnolia?!-- came out of the woodwork, their partners, spouses, assistants and friends spilling onto the dance floor.  


Moon watched in horror as Green shed his blazer and Kukui shed his shirt to the sound of Burnet’s drunken cheers. It sailed through the air, hitting Moon in the face and causing her to loosen her grip on Platinum just enough for the excitable girl to break free and charge onto the dance floor with a gleeful holler.  
Sapphire leapt into the air, making grabs for the chandelier and trying to swing from it like a vine. Moon watched as crystals fell like raindrops and as future research grants were shattered like the crystals being trampled underfoot. Platinum was embarrassing herself without a care in the world, woefully oblivious to the fact that she was a terrible, terrible dancer. She had found solace in Daisy, who cheered her on as Platinum skipped around the dance floor with the confidence and playful demeanor of a toddler watching their favorite stars on TV. At some point the crowd parted and made a threatening circle around Crystal, who had challenged Professors Kukui and Burnet to a dance battle and forced Green to be her partner. Amidst the chaos, Platinum’s Pachirisu had somehow broken free of its pokeball and scampered from table to table, managing to steal an entire baguette from the buffet before Daisy’s Clefairy noticed and ran after it.  


Moon considered calling the police until she noticed Officer Jenny slow dancing with Professor Oak as ABBA blared from the speakers. Instead, Moon got up and went to the bathroom in defeat, ready and willing to throw up if only to shake the awful taste from her mouth and this scene from her memory. As she snuck around the perimeter, she saw Sina and Dexio with cameras trying to record as much blackmail as they could manage while Juniper argued with a potted plant. If there was any hope of salvaging this banquet at any point, it was gone.  


Moon’s horror was her last mistake— it distracted her just enough for a certain someone to get close. Like a Tyrantrum going after anything that moves, a dark shadow snaked through the crowd. Before Moon could scream, Platinum grabbed hold of her shoulders and pulled her into the fray with a cry of “let’s dance!”. Moon was never to be seen again.  


As the night went on and the vandalism charges started to stack like pancakes, Green began to get a little more worried. He stuck near Crystal like glue, praying to Arceus he wouldn’t lose her among the partygoers lest she find a new friend in a bottle of alcohol or an expensive piece of furniture she couldn’t afford to replace. He had to wonder, though, if this is how she felt every day with a friend like Gold. He shuddered at the thought, slowly dragging her to the edges of the crowd.  
As he pulled her out of the mass of dancing drunkards, he passed Bill and Daisy on the bar (yes, on), dancing and calling down to two benefactors doing shots. Their cheers would haunt Green for years to come— and were the reason that not having an open bar was a rather ubiquitous decision when it came to planning Bill and Daisy’s wedding.  


After he snuck Crystal away from them (and the rest of the alcohol) Platinum nearly ruined him by inviting Crystal to dance with her. Thankfully, Sapphire fell from the chandelier before Crystal could respond and Platinum got distracted trying to lift the frazzled dexholder from among the sea of gems she had landed on. Slowly but surely Green was getting Crystal out and away from his hellscape.  


Eventually he had managed to pull her, torn dress and all, from the crowd and outside, where the cool night air blasted them like the most beautiful breeze on this earth. Blazer abandoned and brow dripping with sweat, Green turned to Crystal, who stood there smiling at him with thrilled but tired eyes.  


“Green?” she asked. He prayed Crystal wouldn’t ask him to do something inside; there was no way he was going to enter that labyrinthine crowd again after escaping so peacefully, not even to snag Professor Oak from whatever woman he has trying to dance with now. Crystal only looked at him sadly.  


“Did I do a good job?” she asked.  


Green sighed as he called Charizard down from its flight. He lifted Crystal over his shoulder; she gasped and giggled as he clamored onto Charizard and moved her into a secure sitting position. Winding his hands around her and grabbing onto Charizard, he commanded the dragon to take flight.  


“Crystal…” he said. “You did incredible.”  


“Oh,” Crystal slurred. “Give her my congratulations.”  


As Green looked on in concern, Crystal slumped over onto Charizard’s neck and snored as they began the long flight home.


End file.
